I've been trying to come to terms with all the junk that's happened in my life, not just the past decade. When I was 2, I had hernia surgery and they took me away from my Mom after telling her she could hold onto me longer. I was diagnosed a "failure to thrive" child due to my Gluten Intolerance. I was bullied pretty fiercely from 4th Grade to Junior Year of High School over me going off by myself during recess to dream up stories, my fandom of Godzilla and them singing off-key "Happy Birthday" every day. They called me retarded and they said Pink Floyd was better than The Beatles and they mocked my religion. I spent 10 years in a Church whose congregation would earn Cabinet posts these days for their homophobia and distaste of certain rock and metal bands. It doesn't help that I feel like I'm an empath, feeling other's suffering like it was my own. The Laramie Project, the Pulse Nightclub shooting, the pain video game characters' backstories have, I cry and Mom says I might take it worse than the people it's happening to. I saw a photo of a Canada Goose fighting off a Bald Eagle and said to myself "God loves Canada more than the United States, he will send the EU, UK and Canada to destroy this country and the best-case scenario is that the last few Americans will starve to death and cannibalize in the rubble." I've seen online art of men committing corrective rape on lesbians and performing LGBTQ+ erasure. The Republican government has no floor, and I can tell my fate is likely to be chained to a wall, legs broken and healing improperly, watching them perform corrective rape on all my lesbian friends. I've been through so much, I don't want to go through that much more.
No comments:
Post a Comment